Sunday, July 30, 2006 . 5:50 PM

went to national stadium to watch the Preview show.
It's definitely so awesome.
I would very much like to go for the actual too. Hehehe. Provided there are tickets.
Well, finally we can take a break these few days first.
Hopefully, there will be no more changes come Monday or Tuesday when our video is going to be shown to the big boss.
So let's just pray hard everything will be fine.

Went to katong to have dinner.. ate katong laksa. yummy.. hehe.. then we took a bus all the way to tampines..
Dear gotta go to changi for his sec school alumni chalet so yup, took the last bus 29. lOl.. and I reached home at like a few minutes before the clock struck 12? hahaha..
ALright, it's my first time.. and none of my parents nagged at me..
so surprisingly.. hehehe.. but shall not take the chance to overdo it lar. hehehe.

anyway, tomorrow gotta go down school for recording.. and hopefully everything will be done..
and i'm so struggling with my words on how to phrase for aaup report.. guess, by hook or by crook, i have to get it done tonite!!

just 8 more days to submission of fyp.. let's just chiong all the way. =)

Friday, July 28, 2006 . 1:25 PM

stayed over at joy house yesterday. to rush out tier 2 for my p&c part..
we slept at 3 and woke up around 7+.
and we are late for class. hehe..

morning, seng hee and xiaowei went to take the city shots at Raffles.. quite nice.
and now, i guess.. tier 1 is finalized.
and i'm super duper tired now..
sigh..

Wednesday, July 26, 2006 . 10:44 PM

I have to re-edit again..
and tomorrow stayover at Joy house..
with dear.. to re-edit...
how nice..
haiz.. there goes my face popping with all the pimples again.. =(
worst of all, we need to re-edit all within one day.
tomorrow will be a rushing day for us..
haiz..

let's hope after all these, there won't be any more mistakes or re-editing..

ciao..

Monday, July 24, 2006 . 7:43 PM

We are done with our video.
And now settling all the admin work.
Which Joy has easily settled most of them.
And the rest of us just have to concentrate on polishing our main roles as what she said. Haha..
And yes, I will be pressing everyone for things they have done so far.
To update schedule of course. Haha.. Okays, I admit.. it's been long since I updated the schedule with minor details and tasks. Of course, all the major ones has been updated just last week. Hehe..
And yes, by pressing everyone for things they done, I'm also trying to kill their brain cells in the meantime. Hehe.. By asking them to recall things they have done so far.. so.. Produzione.. keep track of what you are doing!! Hehe. =p

Tomorrow, we'll be having a meeting. About what I don't know. Guess, it's about stuffs we are going to put in presentation slides?
It's not too early, neither is it too late to start preparing now. We are left with 14 days minus off the weekends, it'll be 10 days.
Busy busy busy..
Rushing rushing rushing..
But I think I'm loving it all to bits. Hehe..
As this will represents the ending of FYP, and the starting of ITP.
And in just a few months time, we'll be graduating.
And sad to say, I won't have my buddies to laugh and have fun with.
It's all in the past.. and it's all over.
Maybe I should be glad that I won't be seeing them anymore.
Or maybe I should have just delete their msn contact after graduation huh?
Give me suggestions...

Anyway, this coming Saturday will be the Preview show.
It's gonna be so exciting..
And all of us are going down this Saturday.. hehe.. even though we have stopped Production work. =)
Well, guess it'll be the last time we're going to be in the stadium.. =(

Plans for my future is so difficult. I still don't know which is best for me. sighhs.. Everything's gonna be so difficult and so hard.. But I guess, I just have to keep on trying, isn't it?
Many a times, I tell myself I have to adapt to new changes quick. But I find myself adapting slowly.. What to do?
Just live life as it is, right?

Well, one thing for sure.. 6 to 7 years down the road, I will be dear's official wife. Hehe..
This is one plan I have set for my future. =)
Are you happy my dear boy? Hehe. =) *winks*

Saturday, July 22, 2006 . 10:15 PM

I'm a happy little girl today. Hehe..

Spent the afternoon outside with dear..
As usual, walked around endlessly.. with nothing in mind to buy..
went to og albert outside eat katong laksa. yumyum.
it's been ages since i had that. =)

went city link mall MPH.. read books that introduce all the good makan places.. yumyum.. more food.. I'm a hungry girl today too. hehehe..
by the time we reach suntec basement, it's about 6+ going 7. Haha..
Ate nydc.. first time there..
a little hesistant coz seems a little ex..
buthen dear say once in a lifetime eat still okay..
so fine lor. went in and eat..
and.. I got my oreo cheesecake from there.. it cost $9.95 can.
One word: Superb.
Though it's quite expensive for a cheesecake, I think dear don't mind making me smile and happy.. moreover, it's yummy too.. dear agreed with me also. hehe..

that's why i say...
I'm a happy little girl today..

dear, thank you very much. really love ya lots. =)

Friday, July 21, 2006 . 11:20 AM

bored bored bored..
like nothing going in class now.. coz its acan practical.
wastage of time can..
i rather go home early and sleep. hehe..

anyway, in another 2 weeks time, fyp's gonna end..
relieved and sad at the same time,,
relieved coz no need to chiong like army ants.
sad coz no more produzione filming.

and aaup practical test is like on 1st aug. how nice.
thought of pon-ing class on that day coz it's 18 mth.
sighhs...

Thursday, July 20, 2006 . 11:06 PM

the after-math of not exercising for a very long time are body aches, muscles pain.. and more..
can't imagine the fact that I have to drag my feet and body out throughout these few days..
abit tired and sian also..

went national library today with dear buthen forgot bring library card.. and I can't even use ez-link card coz i lost it before..
so sad lah.. no books..
and dear brought me to eat subway as promised after school today. hehe..
thankew dear. =)

came back home after library and i fell asleep.. all the way till 6pm. hehe.. while dear helped me do final refinement for tier 2. hehehe..

dear, i love you lots. =)

Tuesday, July 18, 2006 . 10:29 PM

had NAPFA test today.
Woah. so tiring..
And my timings all deprove.. By alot.. =(
No more silver.. So sad man..
But actually, without training, I still can get Bronze should be quite alright isn't it?

Anyway, did our AAUP Assignment 2. Cool.. and fun.. Hehe.. Can't wait for next Tuesday where we can play with the DSP in Protools again. Hehe..
Now so tired.. buthen I promised Joy to get tier 2 done and let her see tomorrow. Not so much left but...

But...

But...

I'm so tired that I'm having a mental block now..
Give me my momentum and I shall do continuously. Hehehe..

Sunday, July 16, 2006 . 8:49 PM

Saturday:
NE Show for the Pri 5 kids. Stadium is so noisy can. Hehe.. All the screams and cheers.. Quite fun I should say.
However, the NE Show a little screwed up lar.
The cameras that we loaned out from the school so damn screwed.
But just hope the footages are alright lar.
Else this coming Saturday gotta go back again..

And I seriously don't know why I feel so tired lately..
Late nights? Not enough sleep?
But never mind, just another 3 more weeks.. and we will be through.
Anyway, had a look at the photos Jen uploaded. The words she used to describe each photo is quite funny and nice. Hehe.
And finally.. my part for tier 2 done. Just have to see Joy will accept it or not. Hehehee..

Saturday, July 15, 2006 . 12:47 PM

I have been thinking of the future.
Well, definitely after what my mom has said..
If end up I have to work irregular hours will I still want it.
Since for attachment, there will be irregular hours.
Of course I will still carry on doing it.
For if I can't get a job in this line, isn't all the time and money will be wasted studying this course?
And yes, I did say I would like to sign up. That is if I could not get a job in production line.

Although working irregular hours is not quite for me, but I can learn. Unless, I have made up my mind that I want to stop learning, which is so impossible.
I may grumble and find it a chore to do things I may not be interested in, but I will still do it.
This is me.
Just like how I always complained that the Maths teacher in our secondary school are throwing piles and piles of E-maths and A-maths for us to do. And I still completed them all. =)

Or should I really give a thought to my future plans again?
Should I go for a 9 to 5 job? Or a job that works irregular hours?

*ponderrs*

Friday, July 14, 2006 . 9:32 PM

Finally.. Produzione-1 has all found a company for ITP.
Hoorays..
Joy found one yesterday and mediacorp emailed dear if he's still interested.
And so, that guy went down mediacorp to get his form signed. early in the morning somemore can.
But good for him.. pay not bad.. got shift work somemore.. and is involved in studios side.
*envies*
Want also don't have the chance. =(
But never mind. hehe.. coz he's my dear.. =)

And we made a pact. Hehe.. Don't forget ah..*winks*
Tomorrow might be our last filming session in the stadium.
So sad.. Can't have fun running around anymore.
3 more weeks to end of FYP.
Very very fast.....

Wednesday, July 12, 2006 . 10:38 PM

Finally..

I've found a place for me to do attachment..
and with companions some more..
how nice can it be?
But.. we were hoping for more..
Hoping that dear and joy would be taken in with me, xw and senghee..
i will miss dear alot.. how??
seems like no choice but I really have to live with it..
being far away from someone whom is always there to protect and shelter me from everything is really very bad..
and I have to learn coping with it..
let's just pray and hope that once work has started, i won't be thinking so much about him..
self-consolation i call it. but i will still learn.. when the time comes.. hehe..

back to editing now.
it's a no wonder i couldn't wake up early today. hehe..
coz i realise at 5am in the morning, my laptop is still on while I was rendering the preview part of the video at like 12+, 1am.. like duh.. must hurry now.. 25 days only...
ciao~

Sunday, July 09, 2006 . 9:38 PM

didn't have the time to think of a new url. shall do it next time then..
probably when fyp ends..
as we are only left with 4 weeks, 28 days.
many much more to do..

am shag now. coz just came back from joy house..
went to do editing at her house.
we have a big accomplishment today.. and that is... editing for so long.. hahaha.
well, editing is so much more fun than what I always thought.
although it's a little troublesome but, I love editing more than anything. hehehe. =)

anyway, filming at the National Stadium yesterday was quite okay. Except security is kinda tight. Guess for the NE show, Preview and actual show, security will be doubled of yesterday huh?
And I think, we gotta scrap away the Preview show. Reason being the POC wanted us to show him by end July since he's flying away again. Had a nice time yesterday too..
First time witnessing the gun salute on the spot. Loud blasting sound okays? But luckily got ear plugs.. Overall, the show yesterday was too great. It could actually be taken as a Preview for us. Hehehe..

okays.. enough of yesterday. hehe.. tomorrow gotta be in school by 10am. Capture tapes.. editing the tier 2.. and stuffs.. Joy and my target is to finish tier 2 by tomorrow. Which I think is very highly possible..

anyway, back to editing again. hehe.. =)

Saturday, July 08, 2006 . 12:30 AM

friday 7/7/06
been editing tier 2 of the video since thursday.
accomplished nothing much and now, at least i accomplished something.
am taking one step at a time now to edit..

anyway, went for originasian interview today. think not bad lar. now only wondering if they will accept. *prays hard*
went army market before interview. and dear and I were like having so many things on my hand. okay lar, mostly is dear coz he helped carry my laptop too. hehe... but i got help him take also okay? =p walked so long from lavendar to originasian venue. so far can.. end up, we realise farrer park is nearer. hahaha..

dear, must remember what we talked today okay?
we shall make no empty promises. =)

Wednesday, July 05, 2006 . 9:59 PM

Might change the url for my blog in 2 days time. This might be the last time I'm penning everything down.
Sometimes, I really wish to disappear into the air..
Maybe without me, he would have had a better life and a better gf.
He wouldn't need to tolerate all my nonsense then.. And of course, he wouldn't need to be hurt either.
Although at the end of the day, everything's gonna be solved, the same things will happen again the next time.

For once, I wish to shut my mind off from assignments and FYP.
But I can't, for I want to produce a good work for Joy.

I will be fine.. and I will be alright..
I just need ample of time to recover.
I don't know how long it will take..
I only know, I need a long long time. i always can't tell him how i really feel..
through the phone and face-to-face..
coz i know what his answer to me will be..
so no point..

anyway, i declare myself officially broke. though 50 bucks just went in yesterday from my dad.
shall limit the 50 bucks for 1.5 weeks. hehehe. i shall try..
later still have gems.. abit don't feel like going..
i only want to have a long long sleep..
or am i only so so so tired these few days?
sighhz...

Monday, July 03, 2006 . 10:13 PM

went to joy house in the morning.
to discuss about tier 2 of the video..
followed by dear and xiaowei who came over to touch up on tier 1.
looked through the videos and took note of those parts that we would like to take.
also as well, to keep a look out for shots in tier 3.
met seng hee for lunch den went back to joy house to continue our stuffs.
coz she gotta tutor her kid at 3+.

took the bus back with xiaowei to interchange.
whereas dear went seng hee house cut hair before coming up for dinner.
yes. i'm still recovering from yesterday.
the fear i had in me. the thoughts i have been thinking.
thus, i'm rather quiet today.. at least i think..
yes. i seem to have forgotten how to smile then.
for my heart was cold still cold towards him.

he came over when he was done.
and the hug he gave sort of warm my cold heart.
it felt cold still.. for i'm still thinking..
and i can never stop thinking..

i'm a happy little girl to end the day with..
but i will always still be thinking of the millions and trillions and zillions of negative thoughts.
i'm trying hard to push the thoughts away..
but till now, i can never just do it.
maybe i have really been frightened by him yesterday.

tired................. i'm in the wrong today. super uber duper truple wrong.
but i still behaved the way i did.
all to my stubborness.. and my ever changing seasons..

but he had shouted at me too.
for i'm so unwillinging to talk.
and yes, i got a shock.
and yes, at that point i'm thinking.. the past will repeat itself again..
and again..
and again......
where everything starts to change...
and yes, that's when all the more i kept quiet and all the more i'm unwillinging to talk.
i've seen him cried.
i've seen him hurt.. but i'm still thinking.. will things change?
coz i foresee things will change.. i don't know how drastic it will be and i don't know what they will be either..
he doesn't know the fear i had..
for i really kept very very quiet..
i'm thinking of the worst.. where assurances would lead to nowhere..
and i think..
and think....
and think......
had he had enough of my unreasonablities? that's why he shouted at me?
had the words" break up" never occurred in his mind?
does he know how negative-thinking am i and hurt whenever i'm showing him attitude or throwing temper at him?
does he know the reason behind for every failed relationships i had in the past?
i kept on thinking.. till tears started falling.. but he failed to notice them..
and i continued thinking........................
till i'm tired of thinking..
till i'm feeling my stomach growling..

am so sorry to xiaowei for letting her see such a thing.. sorry girl..

and back to stadium..
where everything is hectic..
ran a while with senghee and joy.. before xiaowei takes over after dinner..
they had a fun time i guess..
i wish i could too.

sometimes, i really wonder..
should i just keep to myself at times..
i feel like.. but people will perceive it as i'm throwing a temper. i'm giving an attitude..
there will be times where i wish for a peaceful and quiet moment..
where i'm free from everything..
where i get to enjoy the breeze that's blowing past..
where i get to see the stars shining at night..
i wish i could do all these..
but there will never be a time for me..
for we are living in a hectic lifestyle.. where 24 hours is never enough.
for i'm a girl who can't stay out late..
i long to be free one day...

or maybe it's time i return to my old ways..
with my worst temper and attitude..
with tear glands that will never stop flowing..
and of course, return to the rebellious me...
sighhs...

i'm never like any of the produzione-ians..
that is, the slight difference in EQ.
am just so so different from them..
even from him..

these are unspoken thoughts of mine this afternoon..
sorry dear and xiaowei..

//i foresee history repeating itself.. someday.. one day.. it will happen...//

Saturday, July 01, 2006 . 10:12 PM

1st of july:
youth day. saf day. syf opening ceremony. 17 months. hehe. so many occasions. =)
went town with dear today. bought famous amos cookies and eat. yum yum. hehe. then while walking out of taka, there's the food festival. more food! so we bought something and eat. so yummy. hehe.
walked all the way to far east then shopped around for a pair of slipper. bought one hehe.
then walked back all the way to dhoby ghaut and took train to bugis.
went to catch the superband revival groups there. and Mi Lu Bing has lots of supporters. woohOO.. and they are so so so multi-talented lar. and sam is so cute. hehe. =p
anyway, after that, went to national library. borrowed some books home and read. hehehe. reading books = cannot disturb. hehe. and finally i got something to do.. read books. hehehe.
went to eat after that then went home.
so full and tired now. oh ya, and expenses are on dear today coz i'm left with only a miserable $11 in my account. =(
thankew dear.
last but not least, happy 17 months anniversary. =)

30th june:
went for acan practical. nothing much at all lar. he went through our assignment 1 and that's it. but we were all busy playing games. hahaha.. then after class, went to eat breeks at marina square with produzione-1. spend quite alot though. gotta start saving up liao. else i will be so broke lar.
after lunch, walked around till 4+ den went back school collect camera before heading down to industrial business park to take digital camera back. long journey home after that. so tired lately that i kept sleeping through the journey to and fro school.
must be the period that is coming. it's always like that.