Monday, February 28, 2005 . 9:57 PM

Today is a bad day. I’m sad and I swear that this is the first time I’m feeling this way after being with him. And it’s all his that senior- junior thing again. Why can’t they just leave him alone? Just don’t know why hearing about his that senior –junior thing, it just gives me the creeps. Haiz. During break time, he called me, sounding very urgent. His senior wanted to find problems with him regarding his junior thing. It’s like what the hell can? Been freaking long already and now then looked for him. What the heck can! Only when he told me everything, then I know how he felt. I wasn’t thinking much about that thing and I even told him to relax. It’s like they will do anything to me or him like that. Even josel felt this way too. Typical people. Thought that only exists in secondary school. Only then during stsc, he called me out coz da ge wanna teach what to do. So I went out for a while lor. then weixin and Irwin also there. We told him to call his senior then in the end, his senior say Friday then come down. What the heck la! Why must we accommodate him when he’s the one finding problems? Even weixin, Irwin and da ge thought that way too. Then later he called his senior saying he can’t make it on Friday also. So in the end, his senior don’t know say what thing, and he promised his senior he will not have anything to do with his that junior cum his senior girlfriend. I was so mad when I hear that sentence can? It’s like he’s thinking it is all his fault when it’s not even his fault. From then, I just kept my mouth shut don’t even want to talk to him or sms him much. I was just so mad at him but I couldn’t tell him. haiz, what a stupid girlfriend he had, to keep everything to herself and typing here in this blog.

Halfway through stsc, I felt like crying but the tears just never rolled down. I don’t even know who can I turned to so I just smsed mummy. I complained to him that I’m sad etc. haiz. (to mummy: see what a dumb nu er you have??) Until when school end, I go find him, I still never talked much. What can I say? He must have really felt mad then that I never answered him and all and he’s just controlling his temper. Can feel that. All the way back to tampines, I still never spoke a word. I must have been mad to not to talk to him! Well, no doubt everything’s settled, I still can’t see why he has to use that tone to his senior. =( Before I reached home, I assured him not to think so much as I will tell him tomorrow. Should I or should I not tell? *ponders*

In any case, I felt much better when I’m home. But I still felt uneasy. I don’t know why. It’s like as though I feel he will do something stupid. I don’t know. =( Hope that’s not the case. Well, today is the release of ‘O’ level results. Asked the 3 grandsons how they fared. And my god! Two of them did badly! Only one managed to get less than 20 for L1R4. haiyo!

**anyway, today is sidik's birthday! happy birthday to you!**

Sunday, February 27, 2005 . 11:40 PM

25/02/05 -Friday
//sad sad sad//
seems so quiet these few days. something is definitely fishy going on but I can't describe it.
*shrugs*
I dono why also that's why I nv tell him anything. cox I feel it's just some sort of mood swings. haha.. plus lately felt KP has been distant from us too. then the whole of today also nv talk to her. like so bad.. haiz..
if being in a relationship like hers, I would choose to give up. If anyone is to blame, it gotta be the one who created everything. *sighs*
Why can't one just really cherish the person they like?
*ponders*

after class, went to bugis eat LJS with him, sher and aiwee. gotta slacked for 5hours plus.. then before we left, we all take turns go toilet. And the cubicle is like damn small la can? Then his hp dono how he dropped into the toilet. Haiyo, he lately like very bad luck. =P
anyway, after that, went to play pool. Played till 5pm then we left the place to go back SP for the FO camp 05/06 meeting. WoohOo! Was under the same committee with sher, him and cher. All under welfare. Hehe.. worst is we found out that most of our holidays we gotta come back to prepare the things. ArGH! the meeting end like about 8pm den we went home. I never allowed him to send me home coz it’s so late already and he doesn’t have a hp with him yet. Haiz.. miss him lots but dono why just can’t say out..

26/02/05 – Saturday
woke up very early coz went to seletar camp with my dad and 2nd sis. Go there see those combat engineering things.. den talked about some of those combat engineering stuffs. How they neutralize gas poisoning etc. then came back home so tired, so I slept awhile before waking up at 2.20pm and bathe. After bathe finish, went to tampines interchange meet mummy. Weixin invited him to her birthday party then he dono what to buy so I pei him go walk walk at tampines mall and see what he can get her. In the end, we thought of buying some things that gotta do with her horoscope de. Then shun bian ask mummy buy me something also. Hehe.. thankz ah mummy! =) den about 4.30pm like that went to mrt station and wait for him, weizheng, Jessica, da ge, yueyi and Irwin. Then after we all went to weixin house. Her room very nice, a lot of mayday posters then go jack jack somemore. So cute! hehe. Then got many other things la. Hehe. then watched tv while waiting for her VIP and also while waiting for her mom to cook finish. Nice nice.. then 9pm we left her house coz my dad picking me up. =)

oh ya, dono what happened to him also. Suddenly face like black black.=( den while walking in the ntuc coz weixin need buy thing, he tell me lor. actually it’s natural for guys to think like that but if to the extent of like my class that two, I already angry lo. =) so don’t feel bad la ok? Anyway, after I come home, bathe and all, it’s already 10.30pm. so I go slp while msging him halfway. Too tired I guess.. lately slp damn early..

27/02/05 (sunday)
woke up early today.at 9.30am. haha. did some housework coz my maid not in. hehe. i so good rite? =P he went out to discuss his dvid and den later gotta go with weizheng to meet sher they all to help film in sher's grp video. everyone's seems to be finishing filming. and when is mine going to start? =( scared can't complete it. so many things on our hands now. it's all about time manangement I believe.
well well, it started to rain these few days and I'm so glad.at the same time, abit sad. why? coz raining means a good thing for all Singaporeans as the weather has been freaking hot for one whole month. it's a bad thing coz I can't go swimming anymore. =( so sad rite? anyway, I sort of had my stsc story idea out. just ain't sure if it will work out. shall ask him to help me see. hehe..

Thursday, February 24, 2005 . 10:09 PM

almost late for audio.. haha.. cox i woke up at 8.30am! haha.. anyway, I find that audio lately quite fun. haha.. then after that is stsc. see mtv.. so nice.. hehe... then break. sian.. boring...

then audio pract. since tim teo they not here yet, i take the time to call the cip thingy.. then after that got to reshuffle the dates again.. so discussed with them again. then everyone's settled le except some persons. lucky I control my temper sia.. else I will just scold lor.. can't stand people who are like that can? then after audio end, they come find me talk and I call infront of them to settle the cip thingy.. then this time, jo angry. Still got for what reason lor.. and I sacrificed manz.. else I will be going on next wed and sat le.. and I skipped java lecture.. like what the hell can? anyway, don't feel like saying le lor.. so what if they are a couple? I'm also a couple, but I don't find myself doing everything with him? Why must a couple do everything (eg: assignments, cip etc.. ) together? just don't understand lah..

anyway, java pract nv do anything again. haha.. dono how to do. was supposed to start on assignment. lolx.. den after that abt 4.30pm like that the 4 of us go fc6 buy things eat and drink. hehe.. so slacked lah we all.. lolz.. can played games in miniclip somemore.. hehe.. then after that go wait for him at 2013. his class peeps came out saw me and tell him then he came out ask me go in but i don want. haha.. guess I'm thinking about something lahz.. that should explain my sudden mood of being so quiet.. haha.. sorry ah!!

Wednesday, February 23, 2005 . 9:36 PM

alright, went to sch 'early' haha.. den went into the class, that wormy suan me la can? haha.. but at least I'm a little awake after the suaning. hehe.. den got 3 hr break. Me, Jo and WZ went Graduates' Guild to play pool. Hehe.. then there already got shawnyboi, teddy bear and wormy.. It's quite cheap la. $6.30 per hour. Haha.. depends on how many ppl playing.

Lunch was free today. PTN lunch remember? hehe.. When we reached pizza hut, they have already started eating! We ordered our pizzas and then started eating. We crapped alot too. Haha.. especially the table who were the VIPs(me, wz, jo, wormy, shawnyboi and teddy bear). damn funny la can? haha.. then before we left, we mixed Tabasco with Pepsi. A whole bottle of Tabasco that teddy bear had poured in and shanwyboi actually drank it down. Just for a bet of $2! Lolz..

after class, got movie screening.. I watched Osama coz he also watching that. But not becox of him I watched la.. cox if KP and WZ, Wz will feel so 'bright' so it's couple lor.. yup. the movie was kinda boring at the first part but subsequently it's ok. Just couldn't understand the language. But with him telling me the story, think ok la.. haha.. abit funny also.. hehe.. then after that pei him wait for jen ang.. the whole of 01 class waiting for jen ang to give ang pao. so good.. =(
then later they asked jen ang regarding their video thingy.. their's damn good lor.. so xian mu.. nvm, next time production must add me in also!! hehe.. like whay weizheng say: must add extra person for everything they do.. haha..

Tuesday, February 22, 2005 . 11:05 PM

Pulled myself lazily out from my bed. Just couldn’t wake up at all. So sleepy because last night couldn’t sleep, so end up playing games in my room den who knows, when I slept, had a bad dream. So scary can? Forgot what dream was it already. Then slowly dragged till 7.35am then leave my house. Haha.

First lesson: STSC tutorial. Fun fun! Hehe. Did drawing. As I was late, Mr Lau told me that we have to draw what we are thinking right now. Then for no reason got suan by CK they all. They say later I draw Alan. Dotx lahz.. haha.. make people shy. =P Hehe. Then after I drew what’s on my mind, Mr Lau came over and I showed him. He can read my drawing eh! Haha. Then got suan by Mr Lau also. Early morning kana suan sia. After that is dvid practical. Also got suan by Ms Ghem. Haha. Wah! All early in the morning suan me sia. Like very fun eh? =P Anyway, he gotta go back home coz his GEMs presentation need to wear at least jeans and nobody tell him. haha. poor thing. Lolz..

Break time went fc6 with jo and WZ. KP and JH joined us a while later. After break went for dvid lecture. Quite fun hehe.. I think something is fishy about shawnyboi. Haha! Jo thought that way also. Lolz.. then java! Haha. spent 30mins deciding where to go for our PTN lunch meeting tomorrow.(we got 3h break!) I suggested using java to decided for us. (based on the java test: 3 colour bugs-red, blue and green) Red is for Pizza hut, blue is delifrance and green is kfc. Haha. then in the end, it’s between green and red. HAha! so, we voted pizza hut and kfc. Most of us voted for pizza hut! Hooray! hehe.. then after deciding, we went through the java test. So shit lahz. The way me and WZ do like so different from how spicer and the whole class did. Die le!! anyway, who cares? Haha. over le!

Then after java, went to find him at t2157. he showed me his maths lecturer. She very young and pretty lor.. unbelievable!! Plus she’s married! Hehe.. then accompanied him to his GEMs class. Sianz.. go home alone.. thought of waiting for him, buthen it’s like till 5pm. Haiz.. so I went home instead. Miss my dear a lot.. It’s like just in how many hours more then can see each other again but I’m already missing him.. haiz.. =(

Monday, February 21, 2005 . 9:52 PM

so bored.
singtel dono wad happen sia..
whole day cannot call out. people cannot call in. cant even receive sms also..
so sickening
so the whole day, I've been grumbling tat my hp cant be used. haha
only till 4.30pm like that den can work properly le lor. so idoit!
anyway, went for break with him today
supposedly KP go break with josel de. but dono what happen to her then in the end josel went break herself.
sorry ah, jo!
den went home with him and sher.
he suddenly so quiet lor. thought wad happen. =p
talked with sher alot. haha.. from holidaying to shuai ge to hmn.. forget wad le.. hehe..
anyway, my mom's been reminding me to send so much smses.
what can I say? haha!

Sunday, February 20, 2005 . 9:47 PM

so bored today..
plus the weather is freaking hot.
thus, I decided to go swimming. with my 2nd sister.
went to bedok swimming complex. had lotsa fun with my sis. hehe..
we shall go next week again.. yay!
but my skin is so dry now.. haiz.. zhe me baN??

aniway, so far like haven call dear or msg him yet.
felt abit weird weird de.. gotta cut down on sms so cant blame me..
sorry ah dear if nv msg or call u..
tml i bu chang lah.. pei you go eat.. hehe.. =)

where's everyone?

Saturday, February 19, 2005 . 9:10 PM

today slept till 11am. then woke up and started to watch tv.. all till 1.30pm.
den slowly dragged my time till 2 before I go bathe and get ready to go my dad's officer house.
reached there about 4+
terrace house at west coast there.. so nice the house can?
next time gonna own one of those. hehe
then got 2 dogs there. so cute.. hehe.. played with the dogs together with me sister.
only my youngest sister don't dare.. who cares her anyway. =p
then explore the house. it's really big can. so nice.
cannot blame also.. my dad officer the rank really damn high lor.. no wonder can afford such house. hehe
well, today whole day never sms him or wad.. haiz..

oh ya, my mom noe about him le. dono how she noe also. hehe.. my maid told me about it den I was damn scared she will scold can?
then suddenly my mom just pop the question asking if I got a bf. haha.. I there blushing le.. hehe but luckily she never scold. she just asked questions about him den I answer lor..
then she there continue saying lor.. haha.. first time eh.. =)
and I'm so happy.. hehe.. =) he is happy too!

anyway, my house the tampines park connector those bushes behind caught fire.
been 4 hours+ and it's still not put out yet. the fire is so big can?
anyway, I'm really glad that I don't have to worry about keeping the relationship between me and him in the dark le. hehe..

Friday, February 18, 2005 . 10:14 PM

a few minutes late for java. but, the class is still abit empty when I reached.
and I'm the only one who reached in my cliques. so dot rite?
anyway, after java practical, went fc6 eat french fries. share with WZ and KP.
then went for java lecture.
java is always fun when it comes to playing. hehe
bad me.. lolz..
anyway, after lecture, went fc4 with him.
weizheng they all eating so he also eating.. then we go there lor. simple. lolz
kana suan alot by eric la can.
that stupid guy. hehe

then went orchard with him, weizheng, eric, da ge, weixin, jessica and yueyi.
but we went separate ways.
then me and him of coz together la. go walk walk.. hehe..
then take neocard.
then continue walking again.
till weizheng say they going bugis.
then we walked till we happy le then go bugis but no weizheng and da ge.
so we walked ourselves again lor. then weizheng call say they going back
so no choice, it's a world of ourselves. as what janice used to say. haha
then abt 5pm like that, he send me home.
so shocked when I reach home. coz phone bill come liaoz.
uh-oh. over by alot. sure kana scold.
and I'm right! haha..
well, guess I gotta cut down on my smses le.. hehe..
anyway, dono go where and do what tml also.. sianz..
but confirm I want watch my Lavender. hehe.. I find myself falling deeper each and every single day.
Felt so scared that one day I might just hurt myself again.
For falling so deep and the fear of losing him one day.
They say the deeper you like someone, the more hurt you will get.
Even though I know, he assured me many a times that he will never hurt me, I still have the fear.
It just don’t go away.
What can I do then?
The deeper I fall, the higher the chance that one day I might hurt him or even lose him.
Haiz, it’s very negative of me to think about this. But I just can’t help it.
Upon seeing this, he will definitely assure me again.
That’s what attracted me to him, I guess.
His assurance and the security he gives me. =)

Thursday, February 17, 2005 . 10:54 PM

Couldn’t slp last nite. Leg and head pain. Used to it le =X
Today’s lesson was alright. Enjoyed it. Hehe.
One weird thing is dono why today wz late for 30mins for audio lecture and when she come in, nothing happen can? Tim teo still can crap somemore. Haha.
Then I asked KP, and she told me the reason why. Lolz. Want to noe? Ask me lah. Hehe..
After that stsc, watched video clip: Smallville. Nice show. A lot of suspense in it. =)

Break time, finally the 4 of us (me, wz, KP, josel) get to eat together. Haha. I say as if we so long nv sit down and eat le. Lolz. Oh ya, today he break at 12pm also. So good lor. He no java tutorial. =p He got back his maths paper today also. Hehe. So scared I fail lah can? But, hehe, he helped me see my marks for the last 6 questions of the maths paper.(His maths lecturer marking so he noe) I believe I can pass. Hehe. =)

After break is audio pract. ArgH! talked about the assignment 3 criteria and all. Die la! So many things to do. so sickening. Then java pract. Talked about the java assignment. So idiot lor. individual eh. That will be like so difficult to do can? The whole time spicer talking about the assignment thingy, the 4 of us doing our own things. Haha. in the end, no one knows how to start the assignment when he ask to do so. Lolz.. And ya, dono which pig mao cong my mummy!! Log in to his msn account and talked to me. *hmph*
Never die before siaz. Haha. Must be either wormy or gary mao cong mummy!! =P so bad can? Anyway, he end class at 4.30pm. then met him after class. He going for Lifesaver training so I gotta go home myself. Think sher also end early today. So long nv pei sher go back le.. hehe..like so bad.. =X

Tomorrow is a short day. But I dono go where. sher going tp open house coz her frenz ask her go. So, where am I suppose to go? *shrugs* maybe go straight home or go out walk walk? Or ask Arnold they all come out. Hehe.. so long nv see my grandsons also. Don’t even noe which of them are working and which of them are not.

Wednesday, February 16, 2005 . 10:48 PM

hmn.. today java test was bad... well, in any case, java is over! haha
shan't care much. lolz
and got someone can do the java question lor. *hmph*

anyway, after the test went out with him.
we go citylink mall, suntec walk walk and see see.
next time go again. hehe. =p
den after that he send me home =)
one problem is: dono why he today suddenly so serious.
scared me out. Is it because I told him the reason why last time he and his ex will break?
*ponders*
Maybe that point of time I also serious about the reason why too.
Sometimes, be it a girl's sensitiveness or whatsoever.
That's the way girls are.
His seriousness really made me even scared.
The fear of many things.
Hai wo almost cry out in the bus. But luckily never.

sianz.. tml still got sch.. sickening lor..

Tuesday, February 15, 2005 . 5:02 PM

J.A.V.A
tml java test sianz..
no confidence at all.
see java book already feel like sleeping le.
how how how?

Monday, February 14, 2005 . 10:33 PM

Happy Valentine's Day! hehe.
very lucky lor today.
come the aunt visit. then maths test. so idoit lahz..

went to school to meet him weizheng they all. then go lab burn out audio then handed in.
then go back t17 for maths test.
I think I don't even know how to do the maths.
or I think I do, only that I got not much confidence? haha
after that we went to JP to watch I do I do.
quite funny the show. hehe.
after movie, went to his house again.
this time his sister is at home. =p
then he sent me home and hehe, my parents not back yet
expected lahz. since no one called me to rush me back =P

oh ya, sher made muffin.
and I got one too.
thankz alot. so yummy. hehe

and then he gave me a heart-shaped bottle with hearts inside.
he fold de ok?
take him nights to do it.
so touched. =)
it's the thought that counts.
thankz dear.

anyway, today also his birthday. Happy Birthday to you!
hmn, tml gotta study java le. sianz.. -_-''

Sunday, February 13, 2005 . 1:09 PM

hmn. what did I do ytd. hehe. Let's see..

met him at 3pm at tampines to go his Lifesaver's fren house. Met everyone up at eunos. His fren de younger sister so cute. hehe. Played blackjack, dai dee and bluff. so fun. hehe. we played till 6+ den stop liaoz. then went to kitchen and eat. Ate not much cox got not much of appetite. Thank God I'm not the only female there. Lucky still go Jessica. Haha. Then after eating, he send me home.

hmn.. dono wad to blog le.. haha..
tml is his birthday and also v-day. what to get for him? haiyo..

Friday, February 11, 2005 . 9:32 PM

I'm terribly sick.
took my temperature last nite: 37.4 degree C
took it again this morning before I went out: 37.3 degree C
then think by afternoon time at JE eating, felt so hot. even dear said that too.
so in the end he send me home.
then i took my temperature again: 37.5 degree C
a few mins later, take again: 38.5 degree C
so high lor! first time I fell sick with a high fever.
so I spent my whole afternoon sleeping. hehe

anyway, met him at 8.30am at dover. did our audio while waiting for weizheng and weizhen to come. our partners. hehe. then dono why mummy today go school also. he say he go sch study java. dot lahz. at home cannot study ah? haha.. anyway, my audio's done! hooray! I love the sounds manz.. hehe..

Thursday, February 10, 2005 . 10:03 PM

I'm sick! argH!

went cousin's hse today.. so fun. like one big family gathering.
ate lots of snacks.
gonna be fat soon. *laughs*
what to do? hehe.. so yummy..
even my cousins agreed.
the delicacies are different can. hehe
oh ya, mummy's back from malaysia.
haiz.. so sianz. nth to blog le..

Wednesday, February 09, 2005 . 10:19 PM

boring day. sianz
missing you so much.
but anyway, collected more money than my sisters today.. hehe..
but at that same time, felt a bit stressed up.
let him see this, he surely statr saying me le.
can't help it mahz.
audio sounds still left a few more haven record.
felt like re-doing everything as the sounds totally just doesn't fit what me and weizhen wanted.
sianz.
aiwee and sher ah, next time do properly lahz. hehe.. totally cant make it leh.. =p
I know I shouldn't grumble much. but what can i do?
*laughs*
really cannot hear lah. hehe.. sorry ah..

tml still gonna go out. and I'm falling sick le.. coughing non-stop. haiz..

Tuesday, February 08, 2005 . 10:01 PM

My mummy's gone to Malaysia. No one to crap with me online le.. Haha. Anyway, the whole week hasn't been talking to mummy anything. Felt so bad. Hehe.. Later someone see le want to angry le. =X

Been sleeping and watching tv the whole day. haiz. Haven study and all. Zhe me ban? Tml gonna go out take ang pao le. Hehe.. But also cannot spend. Sad leh. Haiz.. Nothing to say also.. so bored..

Hmn.. he sick le. Must take care ok?
went clementi to meet him and weizheng. supposedly to be in sch by 9am de. Then weizheng MD cannot put the mic in, so gotta go there give them the MD and I ended up helping them too. Haha.. Their sounds are actually very easy to do. Sounds in a car park. That is provided you know the person driving the car and things will be much easier. Haha. Then reached school at 11.45am. went to return the equipments then go 2036 find sher they all. KP and JH also there. Digitise the sounds then go off le.

went his house. his mom so ke ai. hehe.. then looked at his baby pics. =p and his room is much much neater than mine can? haha.. don't expect a guy's room to be so neat.. hehe.. hmn. . then after that went back sch to take his MD and mic and shun bian return aiwee's de.. so ma fan they all.. haha.. then went home. so tired. so shag. felt like sleeping but nv. tried to do the audio clips but haiz, can't stand it lahz. do till i give up. I seriously got no mood to do anything this CNY. No mood to study, to do assignments. I'm too tired!

Sunday, February 06, 2005 . 10:46 PM

What the freaking hell is wrong with her? Why pull me down lor? Want scold those 2 idoits just scold them. Why shoot me so indirectly? I did nothing ok? She’s like been giving me hell since the whole of this week? Can’t stand her larhs. If you are not happy with me, just tell me what I did wrong.(I’m sure and I’m 100% sure I did nothing wrong ok!) Stop giving me those useless scoldings and remarks. It doesn’t has an impact on what I’m going to do! Totally spoil my whole CNY mood again lar. Do you really think I will still be in CNY mood after all those stupid scoldings which you shot at me indirectly?

Back to today. Met him at city hall then go AMK take 138 to go zoo. It’s so fun! And practically we were together for about half a day too. Go around recording all the sounds. Though the weather is so hot, I still have him together with me. xie xie ni dear.. Then msg sher and aiwee then met them up. Wah, they faster than us lah can? But our sounds are weirder than theirs. Haha. The funniest is waiting for the goat to bleat. Haha. So stupid. It made a sound just as we don’t want it to. And it doesn’t make a sound just as we want it to. So ended up, the zookeeper help us. Hehe. About 5 we left the zoo. He went for reunion dinner at west coast there. So I go home myself. Hehe. =P

Reach home watched tv. Then bath and try to transfer the sounds to my comp but cannot. Sickening. And that’s when my mom went crazy. Started scolding me indirectly for nothing. It’s not my fault that my 3rd sis is born like that right? Blame it on genes if you have to. Don’t come vent your anger on me. I’m tired of getting scolded for nothing!

*My holidays are all occupied with tests, assignments. How to have happy CNY?*

Saturday, February 05, 2005 . 9:48 PM

tossed and turned last nite.
didn't sleep well.
woke up early in the morning and wait for his msg.
but i fell back to slp again.
he then called me to say he at my house downstairs.
so shocked. and so sweet of him too.
went to school to find sher.
then went bugis to play pool.
sher, janice, wz, him and me
the game was so fun.
went parco after that.
took neoprints. hehe
waited damn long.
but the wait was worth it.
then went home.
he very poor thing. Never sleep last night coz in case I couldn't get to sleep. Then this morning come my house downstairs wait for me.
But everything's worth it.
It seems to strengthen the bond in us even more.
I have a fun day today, spending half a day with him..

Friday, February 04, 2005 . 9:40 PM

felt lifeless all of a sudden.
no mood to do anything at all.
and my room comp is like still on.
all becox I wanted to get something out of mummy.
that's why I'm online again.

Although I felt a little better, I think I'm still not myself yet. *sighs*
But well, tomorrow will be better. coz tomorrow is pool day! woohoO!
I'm sad. I lied to him.
And I seriously don't mean to.
I just don't want him to worry so much about me.
I will be fine tomorrow.
Don't worry if you see this.
Just let me think by myself.
Shan't let anyone disturb me tonight.
Shall off my HP, shall not answer phone calls.
I don't want to talk.
I want to think alone.
A.L.O.N.E

KP and W.Z know about this. They told me not to care. I listened to them.
I won't make myself unhappy. Maybe today is an exception.
It's just not my day today, I'm really tired.
It's NOT your fault. DON'T blame yourself.

practically skipped whole of java lecture. went in during the last 10min. How stupid.
Completed the stsc assignment 1B.
Finally.
Feeling damn tired now.
Shall have an early night today.

Thursday, February 03, 2005 . 9:17 PM

I dono why today I miss him so much. The bond is getting stronger day by day. Does this always happen?
Left alone to ponder by myself.
It’s like ever since I’m with him, everything has been moving smoothly for him now. Eg: their assignment 2 video, jen ang likes their idea and decides to send in for the Tokyo and Canon competition. Then also his senior-junior thing, think it sort of died down a little. *laughs*
I don’t wanna fall too deep too. Just in case anything happens, I don’t wanna hurt myself hard too.

Though I know it won’t happen, right? It’s just in case only. JUST IN CASE.
But, how long can happiness last?
Will there ever be any big quarrels? (I know there will be some quarrels, based on my temper. Haha, but hope there won’t be any major quarrels.)

*ponders*

I don’t expect anyone of us to change for each other’s sake. It takes time to do so too. We like each other as what we are now. Not when we change for each other.

Where to go tml? so bored.. have to wait for 4 sickening hours!!

Am I mad? Why is everyone thinking that way. Haha
It's called hyper-active la can. *laughs*
Well, fine. I admit I'm just a little mad. Haha
Couldn't blame me could you?
Now java pract. SO sianz..
Don't even noe how to do. Haiz..
How to pass java like that? *sighs*

Today reached school at 10.15am. Guess wad. Tim Teo is back can. Don't even know if attendance is taken or what. Couldn't care much too. *evil laugh*
So boring today's lessons. *sighs*
And I still have an hour more before lesson ends.
And tomorrow is even worst. Java whole day till 12pm then still gotta slack don't even know do what thing too. Coz gotta take the MD tomorrow. Sianz..
But good thing too. Don't have to go home so early.
My mom's not working tomorrow.
And it's all my sis fault! Who ask their school to have sports day tomorrow.
And there's no transport too. So can you guess how sickening they are? *laughs*

Oh ya, my mummy got sore throat le. take care wor.. drink more water. Must be talk too much to other gals liao that's why like that right? HahahA! CNY coming le ah.. get well before CNY. want to sick also after CNY mahz.. hehe..

missing you..

Wednesday, February 02, 2005 . 10:02 PM

So happy today. Lessons were absolutely great and fun, especially CD. Just love CD a lot! Hehe.. but too bad it’s ending soon. Was late for maths lecture. Can’t be bothered much too. And anyway, he only started lessons like 8.52am to be exact? *laughs* and attendance was still taken can? Oh ya, dono why today my mummy so weird. Haha.. Msg me halfway then say his hp no batt le. Lousy la.. Next time charge ur hp before you come out. Haha. After that went for CD. Played a game: Know me know you. We are suppose to know our other classmates by finding the same birth month as you, the number of siblings etc. Easy game. Everyone were actually having fun signing their names on the paper. Haha. Then later CNY celebrations. Got cheesecake, chocos, wan wan biscuit etc. Everything were almost finished. We must be hungry huh? Lolz. I love the cheesecake amongst everything. Too bad the class after us do not have the fortune to have cheesecake. (which is also equivalents to his class. Haha) =P

Break time went lab with josel. KP went to settle things with JH, and WZ as usual lahz. So boring staying in the lab facing the computers. Have been practically everyday seeing the computer screen for hours. After break was java lecture. Never listen. Haha. The 4 of us too busy talking le. Don’t even know talk what crap also, until suddenly talked about Chinese surname. Haha. Then I go asked the guys their Chinese full name and all. And one conclusion: My class guys de Chinese names are weird? Hehe. As in not much people would have that kind of names one. =) Then stsc. Lab session again! Sianz.. Josel and KP doing the comic strip den I there surfing net and listening to songs. Haha. So slack manz.. what the hell am I doing lar can. Then after that the comic strip story is ready. WoohoO! 3 cheers for josel on writing the story out. Then he came. We showed Mr Lau and let him comment on it. So funny the story. Hehe. After that, josel edited the story again and then KP, me and him went to do those personality, IQ tests etc that KP had. How stupid can it be lar can? After that went to meet sher at the convection center there. She got the CCF briefing. Haha. Then later we pei him go Clementi to let the person IC to sign his CIP form. Talked so much along the way. Haha. Then went to mac sit down wait for time to pass first coz sher meeting her mom abt 6pm like that at Bugis. Honoured mah? 2 gals pei you go sign your CIP form eh.. hehe..

After that he sent me home. All the way from west to east and then to west again. Poor him. But the feeling this time is so warm. I just seem to be on cloud nine. Can’t stop smiling to my ownself. Haha. And sher blamed it on him!! *laughs* Not his fault hor! It’s natural response and behaviour ok? Haha..

**PS: so many pple know about this le. *blush* Weird thing is don’t even know how my class guys know. Thought only today wormy and that gary saw us today only. Haha. Well, news travel fast huh? Hehe.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005 . 5:22 PM

Feb 1 2005, at 12.12pm.
A new chapter of my life has begun.
This story shall go on and on, right?
Felt as though this is the first time I'm into a r/s again.
*laughs*
This shall be the story that I have chosen and created.
I won't let it stop.
Nothing shall stop this story from developing into a beautiful fairytale.
No one. Nothing. Don't even think of destroying the story I 've created.

You asked the definition of a relationship to me.
No matter how far apart we are, no matter how much time we spent together, as long as I know that we stay together as one heart, I'm contented.
It's not how much we are able to see each other, but the love, care and concern that's being showed.
It's not how much we have given to each other, but rather it's the trust that we have in each other.
To me, that's the most important in a relationship.
Don't always give in to me coz I won't like it.
Don't ever doubt me coz you won't know how much you will hurt me.
I've said my piece. It's now yours.
Together, we shall build a beautiful story.

*yawn* so sleepy. coz I can't slp last nite. Don't know why also. talked on the phone last nite. for about 1 hour like that.. First time since poly life. Haha. I've said my piece last night. Whatever happens after then, is still unknown. That may be the reason why I can't sleep. Hehe.

Things are turning out fine. Let's just hope that this will last. =)